Drowning in Work

“I’m underwater.” “I’m drowning.”

These are phrases I used to use so often. In my head. Outloud. In response to emails asking me to do just one more thing during a 200+ hour billable month. To civilians (Cringe.).

I had never heard these phrases before in the context of being overworked and overwhelmed until I became a lawyer. Then I heard them a lot. And used them a lot.

They so aptly described my emotional experience when I was constantly overworking that I adopted them.

They described the overwhelm. Panic. Exhaustion. Heaviness. Not knowing which way was up. The inability to make a good, calm decision or a plan for managing the workload.

As a former lifeguard, I know that when a swimmer is drowning and panicking, you have to calmly protect yourself or they will drown you too.

You don’t yell at them that they are drowning. You don’t splash more water on them. You don’t hold their head underwater. And you don’t give them the opportunity to grab you or crawl on top of you in a misguided attempt to save themselves.

In the situation where you are feeling overwhelmed, underwater, or like you are drowning at work, you are both the panicked swimmer and the lifeguard.

And right now you are a terrible lifeguard if you’re using these phrases.

Repeatedly telling yourself you’re drowning, or underwater, or slammed, or drinking from the firehouse, or that you can’t do it, or that there’s no end in sight does not make you feel less panicked. It doesn’t allow you to create a plan. It doesn’t teach you how to swim.

It just creates more overwhelm and panic. 

You can become a better lifeguard for yourself by changing the way you talk to yourself to turn down the dial on the overwhelm and panic. By reminding yourself that you are capable of handling hard things. That you always feel better with a plan, and you are good at planning. That you have managed busy times in the past.

Then you can breathe long enough and think rationally enough to stop the thing causing you to overwork or overfill your schedule in the first place.

My guess is…

You don’t know how to say no. You don’t know how to rest. You haven’t learned how to disconnect your self-worth from how much you work and what other people think of you and how much you accomplish. You haven’t learned that you can achieve your goals without the constant hustle.

And none of that is on you. That’s just lifelong productivity socialization at play. But it doesn’t make for a great swimmer or a great life guard.

Are you ready to be a better lifeguard? What’s the first step you can take?