Intellectually Knowing or Understanding vs. Believing - Part 1

“Intellectually, I know A, but I still feel B.”

“Logically, I know I should do C because it will make my life better, but I just can’t.”

Some real-life examples:

🔹“I know, logically, that I don’t have to answer emails immediately, but I can’t stop.”

🔹“Intellectually, I know that rest is good for me, but I still feel guilty for taking time off.”

🔹“Logically, I know not everyone is going to like me, but I can’t stop trying to please everyone.”

🔹“I know I shouldn’t take it personally, but I am spinning out about it.”

Sound familiar?

I know it can be frustrating, but it’s a good sign. 

It means you already have some awareness about what you are thinking and why you are feeling or acting a certain way.

And you brain is already open to the idea that there is at least one different option to the one you are currently choosing.  

It means you are already moving in the right direction → towards changing your life for the better.

There are few reasons why you might know something “logically” or “intellectually,” but nothing is changing for you or you can’t seem to make the change you want:

First, even though you see the logic or rationality in the idea, you don’t actually fully believe it yet. 

You don’t truly believe that:

🔹You have a choice in the situation 

🔹The option is available to you

🔹You don’t control and aren’t responsible for other people's feelings

🔹Other people don’t cause your feelings

Second, you are afraid of how you are going to feel if you act in accordance with it. 

You are afraid of how you are going to feel if you don’t answer emails immediately. If you take time off. If you set boundaries. If you quit your job. 

You’d rather stick with the discomfort of how you are currently feeling (even if it isn’t great) to avoid the tough emotions that come with change. 

Third, but you are afraid of the consequences or tradeoffs.

Of what will happen if:

🔹You only answer emails during a set time period each day

🔹You take time off

🔹Someone doesn’t like you, or gets mad at you, or is disappointed in you

🔹You aren’t available to work on a last minute project at 9pm

🔹You say “no”

How human of you!

But you can do things differently. You’ve just got to get your brain more on board with the change you want to make. 

If you want to get past these blocks, I’m going to give you some tools this week. 

A ❤️ note to you: If you’re feeling stuck in the same old patterns, maybe it’s time to try something new. To get started getting unstuck, send me an email or sign up for a free consult at jenndealcoaching.as.me/consult. We will talk about what’s you got stuck, why you haven’t been able to get unstuck, and how you can start making impactful changes in your life.