Intellectually Knowing or Understanding vs. Believing - Part 2

We’ve all had that situation in which we “logically” or “intellectually” believe or understand something, but we still find ourselves acting in ways that are antithetical to that belief or understanding.

Yesterday, I told you the three most common reasons for this: 1️⃣ you don’t actually fully believe whatever it is, 2️⃣ you don’t want to feel negative emotion, and 3️⃣ you are worried about the potential consequences. 

Now what do you do about them?

Let’s start with 1️⃣, your actual belief in the thought, using the example of taking time off. 

The thoughts people “logically” or “intellectually” believe are usually some variation of: 

🔹Taking time off actually makes me better at my job. 

🔹Taking time off is good for my mental health.  

🔹I should use all of my vacation time or my PTO - it’s part of my compensation package.

You don’t fully believe it yet (or your belief is stronger in some other thought) if it’s followed by a “but.”

Take the belief and add this on “, but ____________________.”

Fill in the blank. 

Why don’t you fully believe it? What do you really believe instead?

🔹That you don’t deserve to take time off?

🔹That it is impossible to take time off for whatever reason?

🔹That no one can do your job as well as you?

🔹That you can’t take time off without hurting your career?

🔹That it isn’t worth it to take time off because of what you have to come back to? 

That’s where the work is. 

Those are the thoughts you need to start exploring and shifting. 

Those thoughts are creating emotions like guilt, anxiety, overwhelm, and resignation. 

Those emotions are leading to the actions you don’t like. To being unable to implement the changes you want to make. 

One way to start shifting these unhelpful thoughts:

Challenge them.

How is it not true? What evidence can you come up with that supports the opposite of the thought that follows the “but”? What evidence supports the initial part of the thought - the piece before the “but”?

Your brain is already looking for evidence to prove your current belief true and ignoring everything else - you have to intentionally redirect it to look for evidence that proves your desired belief true. 

Intentionally opening up your perspective will start creating shifts in your level of belief in the thing you actually want to believe. 

A ❤️ note to you: This is just one of many coaching tools that can help you shift your beliefs and get unstuck. If you’re feeling stuck in the same old patterns, maybe it’s time to try something new. To get started, send me an email or sign up for a free consult at jenndealcoaching.as.me/consult. We will talk about what’s you got stuck, why you haven’t been able to get unstuck, and how you can start making impactful changes in your life.