It’s a trap!

We are a society obsessed with productivity.

It is often how we measure our own worth. Even if we don’t realize that’s what we are doing.

For people socialized as women, it’s not only how much we do, but also how much we do for others. 

And we believe we must do “enough” to earn, deserve, or be worthy of rest (because that’s what we’ve been taught).

This measurement is problematic for many reasons.

Including that “enough” is entirely subjective.

How productive is productive enough?

How will you know when you’ve been productive enough that you can consider yourself worthy of rest? Of slowing down? Of having some fun?

You won’t.

It’s a trap.

Your brain will never let you believe you’ve done “enough” if you continue to believe your worth as a human being is tied to how much you do.

The goal post will just keep moving.

I know you may not believe me (yet) that you don’t actually have to feel guilty for not being productive “enough.” Or that it doesn’t mean anything about you if your to-do list is perpetually incomplete. Or that you can say “no” to requests from other people even if you technically have time to do them. Or that you can rest, relax, or have fun anytime you want to just because you want to and still be a good human. Or that you don’t always have to be doing as much or more than everyone around you.

So as a starting point, try building in rest, relaxation, and fun first on your calendar. In small increments. And make them non-negotiable.  

It may not feel completely great at first. You may feel a little guilty. Or anxious. Or squirmy. Or distracted. Or selfish. Or ashamed. In fact, you probably will. 

Nothing has gone wrong. You’re just challenging a lifetime of productivity socialization. That’s going to be uncomfortable at first.  

How are you going to start adding more rest, relaxation, and fun into your life? 

A ❤️ note to you: If you believe you are not a person who can rest, relax, or have fun, you are wrong. Because you just haven’t learned how yet or you’ve forgotten how. It is possible for you to be a person who is great at rest, relaxing, and having fun. And still be extremely successful. If you want to know how, send me an email (jenn@jenndealcoaching.com) or sign up for a free call with me at jenndealcoaching.as.me/consult. I can help you be that person. 

You can also pick up a free copy of my 10 Ways to Be and Feel Less Busy that I created for lawyers just like you: https://mailchi.mp/jenndealcoaching/10ways