You are not your negative feelings.

You are not your negative feelings.

You are not anxious. You FEEL anxious.

You are not an anxious person. You are a person who feels anxious sometimes.

You are not unmotivated. You FEEL unmotivated.

You are not an unmotivated person. You are a person who feels unmotivated sometimes.

You are not awkward. You FEEL awkward.

You are not an awkward person. You are a person who feels awkward sometimes.

You are not overwhelmed. You FEEL overwhelmed.

You are not a frazzled person. You are a person who feels frazzled sometimes.

This isn’t just semantics. The way you talk about your feelings matters. The way you talk about yourself matters. Because they impact the way you experience the world and the way you show up in it. 

When you define or refer to yourself by your feelings, it’s almost always by your most common negative feeling. The one you like the least.

You can start to believe it is an immutable character trait. And then you are always on the lookout for evidence that confirms that you are that feeling. So of course, you prove to yourself that you are that thing - and the cycle continues.

But emotions come and go. You are the constant.

Naming the emotion - as an emotion - acknowledges its impermanence. Stating that you *feel* the emotion also creates a distinction between an emotion you are currently having and who you are as a human.

Which allows you to get some perspective. To understand better what’s contributing to the emotion. To figure out why you are feeling it. To decide what you want to do with the emotion, if anything.

You are not your negative emotions. You have negative emotions.

Which just means you are a completely normal human being, with a human brain, doing human things.

Ok?

Ok.

A ♥️ note to you: The way that you talk to yourself matters. It impacts everything you do. Everything you feel. If you are like most of my clients, your self-talk is shirt. I can help you change the way you talk to yourself. The way you see yourself. The way you feel. The way you show up. If you’re ready to get started, send me an email (jenn@jenndealcoaching.com) or sign up for a free consult at jenndealcoaching.as.me/consult. Spend an hour with me and walk away with a whole new perspective.