When Partners Make Annoying Requests

Hi associates—

Partners are inevitably going to ask you to do things that they could have easily done themselves.

And let's be honest… you’re probably going to do them.

(It’s always an option not to, of course, but I’m guessing that’s not the option you’re going to choose.).

So you have one of two alternatives.

You can make the task take longer and make it more emotionally taxing by being annoyed. By ruminating. By complaining.

Or you can just decide that it's part of your job and get it done and move on.

If you’re stuck in the former (and I’ve been there for sure), I expect you might be having some version of thoughts like:

“My time is just as valuable as theirs.” Or “They don't value my time.”

(It may not sound exactly like that in your head. It may sound like “they could/should have done this themselves” - but if you keep asking yourself “so what?”, you’ll get to why you think they should have or why it’s a problem that they didn’t.)

You are absolutely right that in the truest sense of the word “valuable,” your time is equally valuable to their time. All of our time is a valuable and limited resource. 

You also might be right that they don’t value your time over their own. Or it could just be that in the billable model, regardless of whether we like it, your time is cheaper (not less valuable). Or they’re busy. Or they don’t know how to find the documents. Or they want you to get more interaction with the client. Or they think it’s beneath them. Or they’ve forgotten how to do that thing they used to know how to do. 

Who knows. None of that matters. It doesn’t change the situation that you are in.

The only thing that matters is how you decide to view it.

And how you decide to view it (i.e., whether you resist what is) is what is causing your emotional experience - not the ask itself.

A ❤️ note to you: Being a lawyer can be hard. But we make it harder on ourselves by getting annoyed or frustrated or upset over things that we can’t change. I used to get so annoyed by things like this. Then I realized I was the one making things harder on myself than they had to be. Learning how to lessen self-imposed annoyance, frustration, and resentment you experience on a daily basis saves so much time and energy. The little things matter. They add up to a big impact on the way we experience our careers. I can help. To get started feeling better now, send me an email (jenn@jenndealcoaching.com) or schedule a free call with me at jenndealcoaching.as.me/consult.