Imposterisms and Women Lawyers (plus a free webinar)
For my women lawyers—
Experiencing self-doubt and imposterims is a common human experience. There's no need to pathologize it,* and there's nothing wrong with you.
But if you find yourself having more of those feelings than you'd like, it's likely a result of:
▫️ Your socialization. Women are socialized to doubt themselves. We’re too much of something. We’re not enough of something. Someone else knows more or better than us. And that socialization works.
▫️ Being smart and self-aware. We know there’s a lot out there we don’t know. When that intelligence and self-awareness is left unchecked, our negatively biased brains use it against us instead.
▫️ Your lived experience. We live in a world where we experience real sexism, bias, and obstacles. The gender pay gap exists. The authority gap. The mommy track. The double standards. Less women in leadership than there should be. (And you experience even more of this if you live in additional marginalized identities, e.g., racism, ableism, etc.)
▫️ Perfectionism. We were sold the idea that we should be good at everything we do (immediately) or there is something wrong with us. If only we can be perfect enough, everything will be okay. It’s a flawed protection mechanism and magical thinking.
▫️Being achievement-oriented. When we are taught that our value comes from external measures of success, we are always looking for that next thing to validate us. And until we get it, we tend to believe we are less than or not good enough.
Instead of taking your self-doubt so seriously (i.e., believing you have a reason to doubt yourself), try this:
Uncover where your socialization is working to your detriment and start unwinding it.
Use that brilliant brain to acknowledge what you don’t know, but also your unlimited capacity to grow, learn, and do new things.
Acknowledge your lived experience, but deciding how you want to show up despite any bias and obstacles.
Look for ways to move towards self-doubt - allowing it to be there and challenging yourself to still show up for yourself.
Learn to validate yourself without relying on external measures.
*There’s no need to pathologize it unless calling it “imposter syndrome” serves you in someway. I find this line of thinking (i.e., deciding you have imposter syndrome) can create shame or resignation and ignores or minimizes external and systemic issues that are unarguably at play, making it feel like solely a “you” problem when it isn’t.
🌟Want some help building confidence? It’s one of my favorite things to help women with.
Join me for a discussion on how to effectively build your confidence. It’s completely free.
Creating Confidence and Reducing Self-Doubt
Tuesday February 13 at 1pm EST
Register to attend or to get the replay:
https://us02web.zoom.us/webinar/register/WN_n4bHulGkQtaLzQ_9V-4oag#/registration
This webinar is part of my Survival School for Associates webinar series, where I’m teaching you the crucial skills to survive, and even thrive, as an associate.
You can find more on that series here: https://mailchi.mp/jenndealcoaching/survival-school-for-associates
