More on Arbitrary and Unreasonable Deadlines

I don’t expect there is an associate out there who hasn’t had or won’t have the experience of being given an arbitrary and/or unreasonable deadline by a partner. More than once. 

Do I wish it wasn’t a thing? Sure. 

Am I going to get that wish? Not in this lifetime.

In fact, despite my best intentions (and swearing to myself as an associate that I’d be different), I’ve given a few arbitrary deadlines to associates myself and then sat on the work product for a few days without reviewing it. 

This happens for a bunch of reasons. 

Most people aren’t great at time management. That probably includes some or all of the lawyers you work for. No malintent involved. The lawyers you work for are human (at least I’m pretty sure they are), and they aren’t always going to manage their time the way you (or they) wish they would. 

Even for people who are great at time management, things don’t always go as planned. As a lawyer, you never age out of getting urgent requests that change how you have to spend your day. 

Maybe the client made the request, and the partner didn’t feel comfortable saying no.

Maybe the partner assumed it was reasonable, but it wasn’t, and you didn’t say anything. 

Maybe the partner is just power mad and loves giving unreasonable arbitrary deadlines. 

Most of the time you aren’t going to get to know the reason. And of course, you are allowed to be annoyed about it if you want! But I expect that spinning in that annoyance doesn’t do you any good. 

It doesn’t change what happened. It won’t change what happens in the future. It doesn’t feel great to be super annoyed (and you’re the only one feeling your annoyance). And it probably doesn’t have you showing up the way that you want. 

My favorite emotion to channel here is unbothered. 

Of course they did that. That’s a thing that people do. And as long as other people are giving you work, you are going to get some arbitrary deadlines. That’s out of your control.

Focusing on what is in your control is going to feel a lot better:

▫️You have control over whether you say “yes”.

▫️You have control over whether you ask if there’s any wiggle room with the deadline.

▫️You have control over whether you ask for detail about why the deadline is what the deadline is. 

▫️You have control over whether you follow up.

▫️You have control over whether you agree to do more work on the project once they get around to reviewing it.

▫️You have control over whether you continue to work for them or at that firm. 

▫️You have control over your emotional experience and how you think about what they did.

A ❤️ note to you: Being an associate can be less annoying. Less stressful. Less frustrating. Less overwhelming. I can help you make it less of all of those things because you can have a better emotional experience, even if you don’t know to create one yet. Send me an email (jenn@jenndealcoaching.com) or sign up for a free call with me at jenndealcoaching.as.me/consult.