I coach and mentor a lot of young professionals. I see a lot of this line of thinking:

“I should be better.” 

“I should be faster.”

“I should know how to do this.”

“I should have done that differently.”

“I shouldn’t have made that mistake.”

It’s rarely ever useful to tell yourself you “should” be doing something that you aren’t already doing. Or that you should be different. Or “better” than you currently are. 

It’s not motivating. At. All.

And really - why should you? 

You shouldn’t. 

Becoming a professional is a constant learning process. It doesn’t magically end when you finish school. It doesn’t magically end as soon as you have your first job. It doesn’t magically end after your first year. Or when you reach a certain level or get a certain title. In fact, it never ends.

What if you are doing exactly what you should be doing?

Messing things up. 

Learning. 

Doing better the next time.

Messing things up.

Learning.

Doing better the next time. 

If you want to be really good at your career, you’re going to have to get comfortable with not knowing how to do all the things immediately. You’re going to have to get comfortable with making mistakes. You’re going to have to get comfortable with the discomfort of hindsight. 

We all experience that in our career.

Here’s what I’ve found - the bigger and bolder the life you are trying to create, the more you have to learn, the more you have to mess things up, and the more you have to try and do it differently the next time. 

Try talking differently to yourself next time you tell yourself you “should” be different or be doing something different. 

Question it. 

Why should you? 

Then ask yourself - What if I’m doing exactly what I should be doing right now? How am I doing exactly what I should be doing right now? 

Acknowledge what you are doing right. Acknowledge what you are doing well. 

And then if you still want to do something differently, that’s okay too! There's always a take away or something to be learned.

But maybe skip the self judgment piece of it this time.

A love note to you: These are the kind of thoughts we tackle in coaching. Dismantling. Shifting. Changing the way you show up to be more aligned with who you are and want to be. Changing your emotional experience of your job for the better. The way that you talk to yourself impacts everything you do. It’s likely holding you back from being as good at your job as you can be and from enjoying it as much as you could be. I can help you fix that. Just send me an email or sign up for a free consult at jenndealcoaching.as.me/consult. We will spend an hour talking about your pain points at work and how to solve for them.