Being Lazy or Unproductive Isn’t a Problem.

Why do we think being lazy or unproductive is a problem? That we should always be doing more? That we have to earn our existence?

Because that’s what we’ve been taught. 

The anti-laziness indoctrination starts early.

We are rewarded, starting at a very young age, for keeping our head down, minding our manners, getting good grades, and doing all the activities. We learn that we are worthwhile BECAUSE of the things we do. The more we do, and the better we do it, the more we get rewarded (at least in some ways).

We internalize a message that we are worthwhile BECAUSE we do all the things.

That socialization continues as an adult. 

Busyness is a badge of honor. Productivity is the end all be all. Time is money. More is better. Go big or go home. #hustleandgrind is revered.

This way of thinking has long historical roots stemming all the way back to the Puritans and their Calvinist use of the “immorality” of laziness to further colonization and slavery and to separate the wealthy from the poor. 

Women, in particular, have been socialized for thousands of years to believe that what makes them worthwhile is the labor they provide.

At work. At home. 

This socialization leads to many common (but mistaken) beliefs:

- You are constantly coming up short, and if you weren’t so lazy, you would measure up. If only you managed your time better. If only you were more efficient. If only you tried harder.

-Prioritizing yourself is wrong and selfish.

-Being tired, resting, and listening to your body is a moral failing and makes you weak.

-Doing things you like for no reason other than that you like them is not worthwhile.

-You should always be doing more. And you are always behind.

-You have to earn the ability to rest and take care of yourself or do what you want.

Those beliefs lead to: 

▫️ Overworking and overscheduling

▫️ Procrastinating

▫️ Burnout, exhaustion, and overwhelm

▫️ Taking on all of the household work and office house

▫️ Always saying “yes” to more work

▫️ No separation between your work life and personal life

▫️ Difficulty resting and relaxing and taking time off because of guilt and anxiety

▫️ Chasing a neverending to-do list with no recognition of how much you have actually accomplished

You’ve been told that being lazy or unproductive is morally wrong over and over—explicitly and in millions of subtle ways. 

That doesn’t make it true. Or helpful. 

Because shame and guilt never creates the results you want. And the results you get from shaming and guilting yourself don’t feel good. And that’s all you’re doing when you tell yourself you’re lazy or that you aren’t doing enough.

Stick around this week for tips on how you can start unraveling this socialization.

P.S. On a related note because of this laziness indoctrination we get, we tend to lead really busy lives. Overly busy. If that’s you, check out my 10 Ways to Be and Feel Less Busy: https://mailchi.mp/jenndealcoaching/10ways