How to Enjoy Your Vacations More - Part 2

Resting, relaxing, unplugging. They are hard.

Well, that’s not entirely accurate. They aren’t hard when you’ve built the necessary skills. They are hard when you don’t have those skills and don’t know where to start. 

In our culture, overwork is prized.

Hustle and grind is used proudly as a hashtag. We are conditioned to believe that we should be productive ALL. THE. TIME.

So of course resting, relaxing, and unplugging seem hard.

Because you don’t know how. Because you believe you don’t deserve it. Because you believe you have to earn it. Because you believe it means something about you as a human being if you slow down and disconnect from work. Because you think you can’t. Because you worry about what other people will think. Because when you try to do it, it feels the opposite of restful and relaxing.

All the negative emotions come up.

So of course you don’t like to rest. Of course you don’t think you can unplug. (Yet.)

The way you are doing it now feels AWFUL.

So my next tip for enjoying your next vacation?

Start learning how to rest and relax NOW. Start learning how to unplug NOW. In your everyday life. 

You can’t expect to believe that rest has to be earned or that resting is lazy or that unplugging is impossible or that relaxing is morally wrong 350+ days a year and then magically be able to do it on a vacation.

So, how do you learn how to rest, relax, and unplug?

(1) Start with awareness.

What are your thoughts about resting, relaxing, and unplugging? What are the thoughts you have while doing them? What makes them hard? 

How do those thoughts make you feel? 

When you feel that way, how do you act or not act? How are you avoiding, resisting, or reacting to those emotions in a way that doesn’t serve you?

What result is that creating for you?

(2) Begin unraveling your social conditioning around rest, relaxation, and unplugging. 

Once you’ve figured out what your thoughts are about rest, relaxation, and unplugging and how those thoughts impact your life - challenge them.

How are they not true? What else could be true? 

(3) Practice.

Practice sitting with the discomfort of resting, relaxing, and unplugging in small doses. 20 minutes here, an hour there. Half a day here, a full day there. 

It’s going to be really uncomfortable at first. That’s ok. That’s normal.

Allow those negative thoughts and emotions to be there and rest, relax, and unplug anyways instead of trying to work them away or distract yourself from them. 

Try and shift to the new thoughts if you can (but you may not be able to yet). E.g., Resting is safe; Taking time for myself makes me a better lawyer.

Show your brain that nothing will go wrong if you slow down.

***

What are your long-held beliefs about resting, relaxing, and unplugging?

What emotions come up for you when you try to take time off?

📸: My favorite place to relax and unplug.