There is no trophy or award for doing the most.

Have you taken a docking station and monitors (plural) on vacation? ✅

Have you taken a laptop on the beach? Not TO the beach, but literally ON the beach, and worked in the sand? ✅

Have you worked poolside? ✅

Have you tried sending emails from the top of a mountain on a hike because it’s the only time you’ve had signal all day? ✅

Have you worked in the car on the way to vacation? ✅

Have you spent a vacation with limited or no cell signal or internet being constantly stressed out and spending more mental and emotional energy on thinking about work than you would have spent if you’d just stayed home? ✅

Have you been late to or skipped or left early from something because you had to just finish one thing or just answer one email or take one call? ✅

Have you been irrationally mad at or panicked about inevitably bad airport or airplane or vacation rental WiFi? ✅

I have. I was one of those Pls Fix memes for a long time. And I refuse to do any of it ever again.

I also have a lot of compassion for the version of me.

The one who didn’t believe that I could do anything differently.

Who thought to be good at my job, I had to be on 24/7.

Who thought needing to rest meant I was weak.

Who worried about what people would think of her if she waited too long to respond to an email or asked for help or took time off.

Who constantly told herself “I have to,” “I should,” “I can’t” and believed those lies.

Fortunately, that person no longer exists, but it’s not surprising that she did.

We are all taught, very early on, that our value comes from how much we get done. What we accomplish. 

That our value is in your labor. And so that’s what we do. We labor. Everywhere we go.

(That’s especially true for people socialized as women. Because you get the added lesson that “a woman’s work is never done.” You don’t get to leave behind the overworking when you go home. Because the home is your domain too.)

But there is no trophy or medal at the end for “The Person Who Worked the Most.” “The Person Who Never Took a Vacation.” “Most Responsive.” “Most Likely to Bail on Her Family and Friends for Work.” “The Person Who Billed the Most on Vacation.” “Most Saturdays in the Office.” “Busiest.” “Longest To Do List.”

Are these titles you are willing to give up?

You don’t need them. Your value does not come from what you do or how much you do. Your value as a human being  is fixed and infinite. It always has been.

You can stop overworking.

You can stop the constant anxiety and overwhelm.

The 24/7 racing brain.

The urge to be hyperresponsive.

The willingness to put yourself last.

And you can still be really good at your job.

Promise.

Don't believe me? Let's chat about how coaching can help. 

If you’re used to overworking, you may not know how to stop. You may not think it’s possible for you. But it is. It helps to have someone on the other side of the overworking to help you navigate your way there and has helped many women do the same. That’s me. I can help. 

Send me a email (jenn@jenndealcoaching.com) that says MORE to hear how.